Category Archives: Tuesday’s Top 10

Tuesday’s Top 10 – Stupidest Christmas presents for equestrians

  WARNING: Only read if you have a sense of humour Check in every Tuesday for our Top 10 list that could feature just about anyone or anything related to Eventing. No rider, owner, coach, or nation is off limits. Remember: “Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.”   10. Pajamas – “What would I need these for when my horse needs a new blanket?” 9. Keith Urban concert tickets – “These are not for the Land Rover Kentucky 5*…” 8. Longines watch – “This is useless; the face is too small for me to read on cross-country.” 7. Godiva chocolates – “Yuck!…

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Tuesday’s Top 10 – Animals we should be riding instead of horses

  WARNING: Only read if you have a sense of humour Check in every Tuesday for our Top 10 list that could feature just about anyone or anything related to Eventing. No rider, owner, coach, or nation is off limits.   Tuesday’s Top 10 – Animals we should be riding instead of horses 10. Elephants – Much smarter than your average horse. 9. Ostriches – Have you ever seen an ostrich buck someone off? 8. Pigs – If you get sick of your pig mount, there will always be bacon. 7. Dolphins – Who wouldn’t want to ride a dolphin? 6. Giraffes –…

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Tuesday’s Top 10 – Things equestrians better be extra thankful for

  WARNING: Only read if you have a sense of humour Check in every Tuesday for our Top 10 list that could feature just about anyone or anything related to Eventing. No rider, owner, coach, or nation is off limits.   Tuesday’s Top 10 – Things equestrians better be extra thankful for 10. Your horse just did a tendon, which is cheaper to treat than colic surgery. 9. That collarbone you broke this year, didn’t require any surgery. 8. You have a vast collection of dogs that you have adopted at a variety of horse shows. No one in the horse world thinks…

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Today’s Top 10 – Things horse people won’t dare post on social media

  WARNING: Only read if you have a sense of humour Check in every Tuesday for our Top 10 list that could feature just about anyone or anything related to Eventing. No rider, owner, coach, or nation is off limits. Remember: “Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.”   10. Draw reins are a gift from the horse gods. 9. I love my OTTB because that is all I can afford. 8. There should be a weight restriction for equestrians but fat shaming is more frowned upon than being fat. 7. My horse is a shit head but…

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Tuesday’s Top 10 – Excuses why my rider is in the dirt

  WARNING: Only read if you have a sense of humour Check in every Tuesday for our Top 10 list that could feature just about anyone or anything related to Eventing. No rider, owner, coach, or nation is off limits. Remember: “Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.”   10. The bitch spurred me too hard. 9. Circles are boring, I like to dance on two legs. 8. Rumour has it she was riding a mechanical bull at a bar on the weekend, wanted to see if it was true. 7. For a split second,…

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Tuesday’s Top 10 – Eventing clinics that would be too helpful to actually happen

  WARNING: Only read if you have a sense of humour Check in every Tuesday for our Top 10 list that could feature just about anyone or anything related to Eventing. No rider, owner, coach, or nation is off limits.   Tuesday’s Top 10 – Eventing clinics that would be too helpful to actually happen 10. Jack Pinkney teaches – Producing the bravest cross-country horse on the planet 9. Mark Todd teaches – How to retire from Eventing for the second time 8. Social media for dummies (AKA armchair eventers) 7. Will Coleman teaches – Strategies to avoid touching those costly flags on cross-country…

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Tuesday’s Top 10 – Thoughts horses have while getting clipped

  WARNING: Only read if you have a sense of humour Check in every Tuesday for our Top 10 list that could feature just about anyone or anything related to Eventing. No rider, owner, coach, or nation is off limits. Remember: “Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.”   10. Why do I have to get shaved when you won’t even shave your own legs? 9. You missed a spot you dumb bitch. 8. If you clip a stupid cloverleaf or heart on my ass again this year, you’ll be sorry. 7. I wish you weren’t…

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Tuesday’s Top 10 – Things that make equestrians say “F***”

  WARNING: Only read if you have a sense of humour Check in every Tuesday for our Top 10 list that could feature just about anyone or anything related to Eventing. No rider, owner, coach, or nation is off limits.   Tuesday’s Top 10 – Things that make equestrians say “F***” 10. When you go to top up your horse’s water and there’s crap in it. 9. Showing up at a far away horse show only to realize you forgot your tall boots. 8. Spilling Regu-Mate all over yourself. 7. Hearing the judge’s bell ring in the middle of your dressage test. 6….

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Tuesday’s Top 10 – Things horses will always spook at

  WARNING: Only read if you have a sense of humour Check in every Tuesday for our Top 10 list that could feature just about anyone or anything related to Eventing. No rider, owner, coach, or nation is off limits. Remember: “Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.”   10. Dogs. The smaller, the scarier. 9. Water. You are wearing an inflatable emergency life jacket but I’m not! 8. Gusts of wind. A clear sign of a tornado. 7. Shadows. You never know what is lurking in them. 6. Suspicious flowers. Could conceal murderers.  …

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Tuesday’s Top 10 – Things eventers think on cross-country

  WARNING: Only read if you have a sense of humour Check in every Tuesday for our Top 10 list that could feature just about anyone or anything related to Eventing. No rider, owner, coach, or nation is off limits. Remember: “Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.”   10. Jump judge, your chair is on my line… You better duck! 9. I need to start exercising, I can’t breathe and it is only fence 11! 8. I’m getting run off with! 7. Sh*t… Where is my next fence? 6. Lost my stirrup… Argh… Won’t…

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